Friday, March 14, 2008

Friends. All of us have them.

Recently I've read a book by those two chicks who wrote "The Nanny Diaries" (I'm so eloquent, aren't I?) called "Dedication". It's about a woman named Kate, her high school love turned Rock Star, and her best friend Laura. The basic plot is about how Kate wrestles with the pain of a high school love story gone awry, her boyfriend leaves her the day of Senior Prom, and heads out to LA to find fame and fortune. Unfortunately for her, he makes it big using songs about her and their relationship, all the while never getting in touch with her. Her life plays on the radio, such huge moments as losing her virginity, her unfaithful parents, all the things you wish to keep private... yet he makes money off her memories.

This isn't a book review (seriously, everyone should read this book, I can't recommend it enough!), because this book made me think of my friendships, past, present and hopefully future. This book transitions between her adolescence and her adulthood, with the constant companionship of Laura. I'm sad to say that I have no real great woman friends around me. Growing up, I was content to hang with the boys and my family. I never knew it wasn't normal to have your cousin be your best friend. As I got older and started (and finished) high school, I had a lot of girl friends, some of which I was too good for and vice versa. I cut off friendships and begged others for another chance. Then I met Paul. I surrounded myself with him and his life, and made it my own. Sadly, when I look for someone to hang out with, or go to the LA Zoo with or something, I call my dad. Hey, I love my dad and we always have a great time together, but it would be nice to have a fellow wife, future mother or something to hang out with and commiserate with.

Luckly, I have my two OBFFs, Laura and Tricia. If they didn't live in New York and Chicago respectively, I'm sure they'd be real life friends (instead of Random Online Friend, like Laura refers to me as- THANKS. :) ). In fact, when I have bad news, or great news, I often turn to them. Tricia will always call me when I have a bad day, and we cheer ourselves up by talking about disgusting food items and the mouse in my kitchen (his name is Mouser, and I hope to God he's dead). Our husbands would get along so well if they would get a chance to hang out. Perhaps this makes them real friends. I hope it does.

Hopefully this post isn't insulting my OBFFs, since in my mind, I DO consider you friends. Even though I met Tricia through Wedding Bee when I was Miss Kiwi, she knows so much about me already, and I her. When I met Laura through Pricescope, we realized we had a lot in common, and a strange online friendship was made. Of these two women, we've shared our wedding photos, our lives and our fears. Just because a few thousand miles separate us, it doesn't mean it's not a real friendship. At least that's what I tell my friendless ass.


lfaz said...

Awwww yay! I totally consider you my friend! Hahaha I sound like such a dork. :-) I just call you Random Online Friend because my...tangible (??) friends are nosy and always want to know how I know people they haven't heard of before. But to other less nosy people I just say "my friend Amber"! Hehe. And one of these days, I swear, we really willlll meet....and I will kick your ass at Scrabble.

fatafelice said...

I know how you feel. For a while there after I moved to New Jersey, the gals on Pricescope were the only female friends I really had, since everyone else was far away and busy with their own lives. I do have, like, 2.5 close friends here now, and that really helps. But I don't think *where* the friends are really matters, so long as they are there to listen when you need them...though proximity helps if you want to go shoe shopping.

fatafelice said...

BTW, if you do ever make it up to NYC, let me know! I would love to meet for reals. ;)